Let’s talk about the 5 ways to improve your people skills today. It’s normal to be nervous when interacting with people for the first time. And don’t let anxiety or tension stand in your way. Most people mistakenly dwell on discomfort, failing to realize that the other person is nervous as well.
Be open to conversations that you are unprepared for. Focus on the interests of the other person rather than your own. And look for opportunities to ask non-threatening questions.”
“It may seem awkward at first, but it sets the stage for a respectful exchange,” Good decisions are usually made when the right questions are asked.
Here are 5 ways to improve your people skills:
Maintain Relationships
Healthy relationships boost your confidence and make your life more rewarding. Here are some thoughts on people skills that promote good relationships:
- Take the time to be aware of the important people and relationships in your life: “People are more intuitive when they have the time to be intuitive”. “In other words, if you are constantly running from one meeting to the next you may be missing important clues in how to get along with others.”
- In order to respect others, you must respect yourself. “Self-respect means knowing what you uniquely bring to the table. When you feel good about yourself, you will be positive and affirming to others”.
- Have the right attitude. The emotional intelligence needed to maintain relationships is more than just people skills. It also involves having the right attitude. This includes expecting challenges along the way, keeping things in perspective, having a sense of humor, and not taking yourself too seriously.
“Manage your relationships. Great relationships may not be profitable, but bad ones always result in losses.”
―
Learn To Deal with Criticism Constructively and Seek Feedback
It takes time and hard work to build strong people skills. Learning can only take place if you’re constantly seeking feedback and criticism. Open yourself up to the notion of lifelong learning and bettering yourself.
If you are a person who flares up immediately when you are criticized, regardless of whether it was your fault or not, then you have some work to do. There will always be times when you fall short in your work, either because your work was not up to the mark or because you were hampered by dependencies on other people or because you took on too much work at one time.
Whatever be the issue, hear out the other person without interrupting or flaring up and try not to take it personally. If you respond maturely, you will come across as a dependable person even if you have missed a deadline.
Leaders are adept at learning from criticism and using constructive criticism as a tool to improve performance.
When you take a moment to ask for feedback, you communicate better and you are more likely to hear and share ideas.
Understand why feedback is important:
No one likes to be preached to. People don’t want to feel like they are hearing a lecture. By asking for feedback and other people’s opinions on a matter, you show that you are willing to hear and explore other points of view.
Interpretation counts. What one person says and what another person hears are often two strikingly different things. Taking time to ask for feedback such as “Do you understand what I mean?” or “How would you have handled that situation?” is a good way to see if you are communicating effectively.
Maintaining a positive attitude makes understanding easier. Asking for feedback shows that you have a confident and positive attitude.
Be a Good Listener.
Masterful communicators have learned that building a comfortable rapport is finding the divine balance between speaking and listening. Most people are too intent on speaking. They don’t realize that the only way to get a true reading on another person is to listen to what they have to say. It sounds obvious. But listening often involves learning how to be silent and waiting for the other person to express his viewpoint. Silence often opens the door to active, fruitful conversation. In time, you’ll learn to be an empathetic listener.
Empathetic listeners are listening not just to be polite, but because of a genuine desire to understand the person they are speaking with. As soon as an honest concern is sensed, the door is opened to sharing information. It’s a simple concept that leads to winning contracts, solving technical and business problems, and mediating interpersonal conflicts – even saving lives.
Some are preoccupied with thinking about what to say next as soon as someone else is talking. When they do, they miss out on the details of what someone says. Be fully focused when someone’s talking. It will shine through, and you will stand out as someone who really listens.
Ironically, it’s easier to come up with things to say when you fully focus on something. Just like when you get intrigued by paying close attention to a movie you really like, you’ll get more intrigued by conversations by paying close attention to them. When you listen closely it’s also easier to come up with questions and share related experiences.
Build Rapport
Building rapport is about sensing what someone likes and being able to act in a way that’s appropriate to the situation.
- Check Your Appearance: Make sure you look good and your clothes are appropriate for the situation. If you’re under- or overdressed, it can create a subconscious feeling in people that you’re not part of their group.
- Remember the Basics of Social Interaction: Smile, relax, use a good posture, talk about appropriate topics.
- Find Common Ground: Show genuine interest in your friend and you can discover things you have in common i.e. you attended the same school, you grew up in the same city or you support the same sport/team.
- Create Shared Experiences: To create rapport you need to interact with someone. This can happen when you work on a project together, grab a coffee or attend a class or conference together.
- Be empathetic: Being empathetic is demonstrating that you understand someone’s emotions when you see something from their perspective. To better understand someone, try asking them questions to learn how they think. Open-ended questions are best because they allow the speaker to fill in the details about how they feel when they answer.
Note: To keep the conversation balanced it’s a good idea to also share your thoughts with your partner on the topic. That will create a shared connection on the topic and avoid the feeling that it is an interview.
- Mirror and Match Mannerisms and Speech: If your friend is calm and you’re energetic, see if you can calm yourself down and meet their calmness. If they are being positive, you want to meet them in that positivity and not drag them down. Likewise, if someone’s sad or devastated, meet them in that sadness before you try to cheer them up. It’s not about imitating people in a mocking way: It’s about meeting them on their level.
Always Have a Positive Mental Attitude When Tackling Problems
Positive thinking allows you to try to solve problems through constructive action. A positive mental attitude lets you build strengths and overcome weaknesses. It helps you realize you’re born for greatness because within you is the power to make any dream a reality.
Have a generally positive outlook on life when you talk to people. It can be easy to seek contact by complaining about something or being negative in general. However, studies show that too much negativity can hurt our friendships. Negative people only make friends with other negative people. It’s not about being overly positive or fake. It’s about not making negativity a habit.
Try to be open and accepting of others and they will more than likely do the same for you. Be genuine. Find things you like about others and tell them. They will appreciate the thought and will dare to act in the same way towards you.
Be it at work or at home, a certain amount of conflict is unavoidable in any relationship.
If you follow these 5 ways to improve your people skills mentioned above, you’ll notice that your communication with people will improve.
We hope you enjoyed reading this article.
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